ITEM: Pre-workout powder, 3 lb tub, "Pump Surge Berry" flavor
CONDITION: Opened, one scoop taken. That's it. One scoop.
PRICE: $35
PICKUP: Local preferred. If you come to my house please do not look in the pantry.

Let me explain.

I bought this tub three weeks ago. Pump Surge Berry. Great flavor. Great formula. 400mg caffeine per scoop. Tingles that start in your fingers and end in your soul. I took one scoop, had an incredible session, and immediately went online and bought 12 more tubs.

Of different flavors.

I now own 13 tubs of pre-workout. I have: Pump Surge Berry (this one), Pump Surge Berry (a backup), Creatine Thunder Grape, Nitro Blast Watermelon, VeinPop Citrus, Blood Rush Mango, Pump Dimension Blue Razz, Beta-Alanine Fury Fruit Punch, "THE PUMP" (no flavor listed, just a black tub with red letters), and four more that I ordered at 2 AM and cannot remember the names of.

My wife asked me why the pantry is exclusively pre-workout now. I told her it's an investment. She asked in what. I said "the pump." She did not consider this a valid answer.

I am selling this one tub to create the illusion that I am addressing the problem. I am not addressing the problem. The problem is ongoing. But selling this one tub will buy me time.

$35. It's good stuff. I just have too much of it. Way too much of it.

Dan. Brother. I need you to listen to me very carefully.

I was you. In 2019, I had 22 tubs. Twenty-two. My entire kitchen counter was pre-workout. I was using a tub of Nitro Blast as a doorstop. I had pre-workout in my car, my office, my gym bag, and one in my nightstand "for emergencies." My resting heart rate was 112 bpm. I could hear colors.

You are at 13 tubs. You are at the crossroads. This is where it either levels off or it spirals. Selling one tub is not the answer. Selling one tub is what we call "bargaining." It is the third stage.

I'm not going to buy your tub, Dan. What I am going to do is recommend you talk to someone. Preferably someone who doesn't also have a pre-workout problem, because that's what happened to me and we just ended up trading flavors.

K, I appreciate the concern but I think you're being dramatic. 13 tubs is a lot, I admit that. But it's not 22 tubs. I'm not using them as doorstops. I'm not keeping them in my nightstand. Yet.

Also I feel like I need to defend myself here. Each tub was purchased for a valid reason. I bought the first one because I needed pre-workout. I bought the second one because what if the first one runs out. I bought the third through seventh because they were on sale and it would be financially irresponsible NOT to buy them. I bought the eighth through twelfth because a forum post said "if you haven't tried Creatine Thunder Grape you haven't lived" and I panicked. I bought the thirteenth because I was stressed about having twelve and thought one more would round things out.

Every purchase was logical. In the moment.

Anyway someone please buy this tub. Pump Surge Berry. It's good. I just don't need it because I have twelve other options.

Hello. I am Dan's wife. I found this forum on his computer, which was open next to three tubs of something called "Blood Rush Mango."

I want everyone here to know that Dan is not exaggerating. The pantry is, in fact, entirely pre-workout. I moved the cereal to the garage. The spices are in a box under the bed. There is a tub of "VeinPop Citrus" where the olive oil used to be. Our children think pre-workout IS food. Our 6-year-old asked for "a scoop of the purple one" for breakfast last Tuesday.

Dan, if you are reading this: I love you. But we need to have a conversation. A real one. Not the one where you explain the difference between stimulant and non-stimulant formulas for 45 minutes. A real conversation.

Nobody buy this tub. He needs to return ALL of them.

Pam, I told you not to make a forum account. This is my space. This is where I discuss pump-related matters with my peers.

Also, to clarify for the thread: our 6-year-old did NOT ask for "a scoop of the purple one." He asked for "the good powder," which could mean anything. Children say things. It does not mean he thinks pre-workout is food. He knows the difference. I have explained the difference. Multiple times.

The tub is still for sale. $35. Pump Surge Berry. One scoop missing. Someone please buy it before this becomes a bigger thing than it needs to be.

EDIT: I just bought another tub. It was on sale. 40% off. It would have been irresponsible not to. Please do not tell Pam.